Chapter 8

It was too late to call up for a cab or anything, so I walked the whole way to the station. It wasn't that far, but it was cold as hell, and the snow made it hard for walking and my Gladstones kept banging the hell out of my legs. I enjoyed the fresh air though. The hat that I bought had earlaps on it, so my ears were warm. I didn't give a damn about how I looked because everyone was in bed anyway.

I don’t mind train rides, especially at night with the lights on and the windows black. Anyway, a lady got on at Trenton Station and sat down next to me. She was around 45 I guess, but she was very good looking. Women kill me. They really do. Im not over-sexed or anything-I am quite sexy though. I just like them.
She noticed the crumby Pencey sticker on my bag. She said her son went to Pencey, Ernest Morrow. I told her I knew him and that he was in my class. He was the biggest moron that ever went to Pencey, but I didn’t tell her that – of course. I told her my name was Rudolf Schmidt. I didn’t feel like giving her my whole life story. Rudolf Schmidt was the janitor of our dorm. I was shooting the bull at her about how amazing and bright and popular Ernie was. It killed me.

I asked her if she fancied a cocktail in the club car, I was in the mood for one myself. I told her I could usually get them because of my height and all my gray hair. She still refused though, the club car was closed anyway it was late. She asked why I was going home before break started. So I lied. Again. I told her I had to have an operation, only a minor one to remove a tiny tumor, on the brain. I was right away sorry I’d said it but it was too late. She seemed really worried for me. Once I start lying I could go on for hours. She was getting of at Newark. She invited me to visit Ernest in the holidays. But I just thanked her and told her I was going to South America with my grandmother. Another lie.